onefootball.com/en/news/cucurella-and-his-locks-now-have-a-viral-anthem-online-43092314

why are we talking about pasta

and sauce sticks to ridges better

and?

i did

google it

are too

am not

you’re wrong

ridges hold sauce better

tubes are better for sauce

so? penne’s got tubes

rigatoni’s got ridges

penne’s better

we should rename him to penne

cucurella sounds like a pasta dish

he’s got a cool name though

still trash

he’s a fullback

wait no

he’s a midfielder

so? defenders don’t score

he’s got 3 assists this season

lol ok

nah he’s trash

he’s alright

plays for chelsea

just looked it up

he’s got a funny name

idk some defender

who’s cucurella