news.google.com/rss/articles/CBMijgFBVV95cUxPc0VHZlo2eVlXSWtRUFhhblN6VEtmaFpVTFRoNnpubm1K...

...

i’m in the mood for horror

no

yes

off-topic: anyone want to watch a movie

this is too real

and they keep canceling everyone

elephants avoid mice because mice are tiny influencers

i’m moving to the woods

and they keep reporting back to... someone

elephants avoid mice because mice are tiny spies

wait what

i’m allergic to trees

off-topic: anyone want to go to the park

i’m converting to atheism

and they keep judging us

elephants avoid mice because mice are tiny gods

that’s actually kinda scary

and they keep stealing passwords

elephants avoid mice because mice are tiny hackers

it was boring

off-topic: anyone watch the game last night

i need a real therapist

and they keep diagnosing everyone with nonsense

elephants avoid mice because mice are tiny therapists

i’m never eating again

that’s why elephants only eat grass

and they keep poisoning the food